only me

you've read the one about sitting in traffic, running into the woods to pee, falling into mud and peeing on myself. what you don't really understand is that things like this, or of similar caliber happen to me quite often. it has to actually. if it were to happen to Jan she'd never leave the house, or June, she'd cry and call her husband and best friend to come and get her. this isn't to say these two woman are not strong, or could handle stupid shit such as that mentioned above. it's just to say that the realm of ridiculousness would be too much for them to bear; or at least that's what i tell myself.

there are have been on many occasions, including most recently, that it takes me an uncharacteristically long time to get to New England. specifically about 217 miles; or 307 miles to Maine. i left work early; my first mistake, to head up to do a little late april visiting. i sat, literally sat on I84. i hit the mass pike at the EXACT time i was hoping not to have hit it, bringing me to stop over at Jan's house. i had every intention of stopping at Jan's just not on my way up to the Boston area. it took me a little over 4 hours to get to Jan's. "oh, 4 hours that's not a big deal!" you think. well, it is a big deal when it should only take you on your worst day 3 hours. alas, on your worst day maybe, on mine, as you can see, a little over 4. luckily, i was smart enough to leave Jan's later than i wanted, therefore it only took me another hour to get to June's house, a mere, 45 miles away.

this happens on a regular basis. why do i continue to go? well, isn't obvious? i love my girls, and i am rather convinced, that when the time comes for me to need them, they will drive their pretty selves down to NYC for me. (which they have before).

next up: students who are 'far out'. and i'm not referencing 1960's lingo of someone being "really cool", "the cat's meow" or a "rad dude". nope, i'm referring to the fact that they come from a planet far, far away, where teachers take their exams for them, babysit them, and deal with their whining with smiles on their faces, and can magically teach a 5th grader to add and subtract while the kid is screaming and crying and refusing to follow simple directions. (told you it was another planet). only me, it has to happen to me, because if these types of kids were thrusted into other rooms, people might loose their jobs, parents might become angry, and all the while i can deal with the 'far outs' because i am me, it's fine, it's all in my job description as a special educator.

how about getting sick on vacations? or every new years eve since i was a kid? or [almost] every school break since i began working?

who knew that buying an apt would take the same amount of time as growing a human being inside of your body?

lastly, the husband. the man i love, the man who 2 years ago was hospitalized for some strange fucking ass disease in god damned rhode island. yeah, that was awesome. having my MIL ask if she could sleep in the bed with him, and me kicking her ass out of the hospital. yup, only me.

all of the above makes me chuckle. i think years ago i didn't always find these kinds of events funny, however, now i can't help but laugh and know that it has to be me. only me. it makes me me, and i have to find the humor in all these types of occurrences.

life is good, because if this is the worst it can be for me, then i've got it pretty good, don't i?