Knowing all this, Dad pulled a few strings and got RB and I VIP tickets to the Tonight Show just last month. You could say that I was excited about it, but I really was over the moon. I'm not sure what exactly my heart thought would happen, but alas, I had some expectations of the afternoon.
RB and I took the day off to be sure we arrived on time, and ready to go. I couldn't wait! We followed directions, I called my dad's friend who got us the tickets, (as I was told to do) in hopes that I would get a tour. (Alas, like most people who work in this business, he didn't have "time" to get back to me, to show me around; just so you are aware, a lot of people I have encountered in the Motion Picture business, through my own time working with them, and dad working with them for 25+ years, they are relatively nice people, who are also "too busy", in general, the people I meet, who aren't construction crew people are, how should I say this, stuck up. Their time is worth more than yours, and they are more important than you.)
I sat in my not very VIP seat, and awaited the arrival of the Roots Crew, and Jimmy. The Roots arrived, and then Jimmy arrived to start the show. Not one second of what you see on Television is any different from being in the audience, Jimmy doesn't talk to the crowd during commercial breaks, the Roots don't play for the audience during commercial breaks; as a matter of fact, you are pretty much ignored by everyone (except for the NBC pages who are watching you to make sure you don't take any photographs). Nary a soul gives a crap about you. They actually say to you, "This is free, remember you didn't pay for this, so let's just act right."
All of the above stung a bit, it hurt my feelings that Jimmy and the Roots didn't give the small audience the time of day any more than what we see on TV. What really was the nail in the coffin was when Jimmy runs through the crowd at the end of the show and RB moved me to the aisle so that I can get a high five from Jimmy. This was it, all I needed to wash all the other disappointment away. Jimmy came around and a lady gave him a gift bag, he was trying to get the camera to zoom in on it, which was right next to me, so I began pointing at the bag as though to advertise it's greatness, and Jimmy Fallon gave me the DIRTIEST look, like what I was doing! I didn't touch him, the bag, or yell in his face. There really was no reason for the look. He even passed me by when it came my turn for a high five.
My heart immediately broke, and I was hurt. I understand that this was ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous, but if you know anything about me, this all makes sense, and you'd be proud that I didn't cry an scream for Jimmy to love me as I loved him.
I haven't been able to watch the Tonight Show since then, because it stung a bit, and the whole thing seemed fake. I know what it was like in that audience, and how not-so-special you are compared to the viewers at home. He also repeats himself, and that makes it less special. All in all, I'm glad I went, I just hope my broken heart will heal.
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